the diving contest at the family reunion was ruined because your pool went flat

your idea of "getting lucky" is passing the emissions test

the last time you went swimming they had to use the boat ramp to get you out of the lake

you join a record club under a fake name

your hood ornament is a duck decoy

the owner of a restaurant had to ask you to "please move away from the salad bar before you start eating."

you often find stray animals in your living room

you pick your friends based on their ownership of jumper cables

the uninvited guests at your family reunion were the SWAT team

you've ever given a full set of NASCAR plastic cups as a wedding present

you regularly check the brake lights on your house

you've ever swapped shirts with a scarecrow

the box your TV cam in has also served as a clubhouse, a laundry basket, ad a playpen

your yard has more than 10 ceramic figurines

nobody else will touch your favorite cap

the flowers in your bridal bouquet were plastic

you always cancel the subscription and keep the free gift

you’ve accidentally injured 1 of your relatives with a flying toenail

there are crawfish in your home aquarium

people drive by your house to look at your Christmas lights in April

part of your parole states that you are not allowed to own sheep

your wedding dress was leather

you ever took a deerskin to a dry cleaner
part 5 coming soon

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Filed under: Dried Flower Bouquets

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